"Great to meet you, Crystal. We are, in fact, very real." He gestured her over to the couches so she could sit down. "Would you like something to drink? Eat? Any other immediate needs I can tend to?" He might have been flirting the tiniest bit, but he really did tend to behave himself in the name of making sure people got the help they needed. And in the name of not getting punched. (Again.)